The church bells rang on a fine sunday. My cousin, ah Yan, and her fiance walked gently and gracefully into the cathedral, witnessed by hundreds of friends and relatives. Ah, what a glorious moment! Ah Yan was resplendent in a snow-white sleeveless wedding gown, while her fiance, Jun Xian, a six-footer, looked dashing and handsome, in a pair of white suit with a sparkle in his eyes.
Soon, it was the ring-exchanging ceremony. The pledges of the bride and groom were done in a stately manner. After all those promises and vows of love, both newlyweds exchanged their wedding rings. They soon embraced each other and kissed... That was where their kingdom of romance began, after a decade long journey of love. How romantic!
Sure, to start a family, there must be a union between a man called husband and a woman called wife. Besides being a symbol of romance and sincerity, both should also work hand-in-hand to build a happy story in a household altogether. Girls would want a Prince Charming, while boys would want a Snow White or Cinderella to secure their tomorrows. However, when it comes to choosing a life partner, it is a matter of cautious rationing and foresight.
Though single, I have visualised my idea of a perfect husband in my mind. Well, indeed, choosing my Prince Charming is nowhere easy. I do not want to get infatuated in love so fast that I may lose in the game of amours and end up being ditched by a Casanova, for goodness sake!
To start it off with, I am not very particular and picky on the appearances of men. As you can see, "do not judge a book by its cover". In this realistic society, looks may lie. A striking man may turn out as a devil in disguise and vice versa. Thus, basically, the facial features and gait in a male are not taken into my account However, I am very specific when it comes to the physique. My future husband should neither be over-prosperous nor as thin as a rake. Nevertheless, a man who looks like Mr universe can be rather intimidating as well. Thus, for the physique, he should at least be a six-footer, and preferably having an athletic figure.
Next, there comes the financial status. My better-half-to-be must have a secure and legal job. It is alright for him to have a modest salary, but I will draw my line at those with a dangerous occupation, such as policeman, soldier and firefighter. Neither do I want a husband who is extremely rolling in money. No, I reject politicians, millionaires, and worse still, BILLIONAIRES. Everyone is money-minded, thus a husband who is filthy rich can land himself and his family into and endless chain of perils and threats. Of course, that does not mean that my spouse can come from the low income bracket. With a meagre sum of money, how is he supposed to feed his family?
Ah, before I forget, the age factor affects my selection of a life partner as well. My husband should be at least of the same age and at most, five years my senior. Such an age range is good enough to communicate effectively because we can understand each other better.
Whatever it is. no other aspect is more important than my future husband's personality, character traits and lifestyle. I swear I will not pick any man impromptu as my spouse because "a miss is as good as a mile". In fact, marriage is no child's play. It is about life commitment to the family and in-depth decency among the parents. Any mistake in your better half and you will have a broken household and a life of misery.
Habit-wise, my man must not practise such bad habits: smoking, heavy-drinking, gambling, taking drugs and, God forbid, womanising! I do not want my partner to succumb to diseases such as ling cancer, AIDS, liver cancer, Hepatitis B, and the list goes on, and on. Besides risking die young, those habits burn off money and golden family hours. I appall being one of those unfortunate women who had unfaithful spouses. Thus, any man with the habits above, sorry!
As for personality, well, my future husband must possess such virtues as listed below:
Firstly, he must be able to juggle between career and family. He should be committed to his career in the quest to fend for his family. What is more, father is the major breadwinner in the household. Thus, I do not mind my husband to return home late due to overtime in work. Nevertheless, he must not stay out till the wee hours of the morning. As for home life, I will happily accept a husband who shares household chores with me. At least, we can save on maids. My husband should also make time to accompany our future children and me. Hello, wives should not be doing baby-caring stuffs ALL ALONE! That is unfair!
Next, he must not be gender-biased. Twenty-first century marks equality for both male and female. Hence, both gender deserve similar rights in proper upbringing and education. Gone are the days where boys could receive knowledge and girls had to stay in the kitchen. Besides, the Biological Theory of inheritance shows that the possibility of having a son or a daughter is equal. I will not risk paying the world for any complicated gender-selecting procedures in babies. At the same time, it is inhumane and cruel to abort a daughter. God makes the choice of parents to have Adam or Eve, thus he should accept all babies regardless of gender!
Besides, my future husband should be a diligent and upright man. As the saying goes, "God helps those who help themselves". He has to be very dedicated in his profession in order to get the best out of his career. Mind you, if your husband is only willing to laze and watch his wife breaking her bones to work, then can he really fend for the household? I fear not. Besides from being diligent, he must be honest and frank, especially to ME. What a tangled web we weave when we first practise to deceive! Marriage should be done and sustained by mutual trust, hence if he dares to lie to me, he must have been doing unspeakable things beyond the household.
Apart from that, my husband-to-be has to be both filial and loving to our families. He can always visit both his parents and mine. Without our parents, we will we be? Parenting is indeed crucial to ensure the continuity of the household. On top of that, he should priortise the welfare of the children, too. He should assist me to instill virtues and emphasise the importance of knowledge within the children. Let me quote Francis Bacon, "Knowledge is Power". In this way, both husband and wife can help to develop all-rounders to contribute to the society. By the way, I reject a control freak. Nobody is perfect and I need some space!
To sum it all up, my husband does not need to be perfect but needs to possess these traits as a family-oriented and devoted spouse. As for the other minor aspects, such as his choice of clothes an interests, I will just leave these to him. He needs privacy and independence too. Thus, my future husband can have his life and devote to the household at the same time, which is what I call as the "win-win situation". For the time being, as a struggling student, I will just leave this matter to God.
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